Recently, I read an article about Alanis Morissette and her parenting style. She and her partner focus on unschooling their children. Of course, she enjoys privileges that most of the world does not, and plainly speaking, they can flout convention. 

Unschooling caught my attention. One of the immediate thoughts that came to mind was how differently I would parent now in comparison to some choices from the past. Not being able to change the past, I began to consider what are conventional ways of thinking or being that I want to unlearn. 

Playing by the rules, coloring between the lines, any way you want to say it, I like structure and rules. I think that following convention was comforting to me because growing up much of my life was unsettled and the last thing I wanted to do was to draw attention to myself. I worked very hard to fit in.

Now I am older and maybe wiser or maybe just tired of following a rule because it is the normal thing to do. I was about to say that I am more interested in unlearning or unschooling myself, and even that does not accurately describe my current operating manual. I want to be open and curious. My goal is to be more discerning about my choices, my motivations. I need to be paying attention to myself and others, not because I am worried about what someone might think or doing something wrong. Paying attention so I can be actively engaged in my life and the world around me.