To describe Yorgos Lanthimos’s 2015 film The Lobster as unusual is an understatement. I remember when it was first released. While it looked interesting, it cut a bit too close to my situation at home. Last night was movie night, and my pick was The Lobster. I loved it. I have become a fan of Yorgos’s work over the years, although I am not yet ready to see Bugonia. Spoiler-alert, this post may include some details about The Lobster.
Screenshot of The Lobster, 2015 Yorgos Lanthimos
A very brief description of the film: the setting is a world where everyone must be part of a couple. A recently divorced man checks into the hotel where the hotel managers, a couple, serve as guides in their guests’ quest to find a partner. Various activities are mandatory, like dances resembling awkward Middle School affairs. Hunting ‘Loners’ in the nearby woods is one of the less innocent required outings, although maybe the one which inspires the Singles to try harder at finding a match. While many of the other activities seem to do more to encourage friendship among strangers finding themselves in a shared predicament.
What fascinated me was the insistence by the hotel managers that a match requires a shared similarity. For example, a young woman who suffers from spontaneous nose bleeds finds a match with a young man who also appears to suffer from nose bleeds. We, the audience and his new friends, know that his nose bleeds are coerced, often violently. I wasn’t sure if his self-harm was inspired more by his interest in this particular woman or by his fear of being alone and becoming his chosen animal. Oh yes, I forgot to mention that if you are unsuccessful in finding a match during your hotel stay then you are transformed into an animal of your choosing. Our main character has selected an unusual choice, the lobster.
The brilliance of Lanithimos’s storytelling is found in highlighting beliefs and behaviors we currently subscribe to, like a world where coupledom is favored over being single then taking it to the extreme. The emphasis on couples who share a similarity or many, really the more the better, is also at play in our everyday world. I think of the times I have morphed into an unrecognizable version of myself to be similar to a person of interest. This type of twinning is evident in friendships too. Within our families, it can happen. I mentioned recently becoming a Yankees fan, albeit briefly to connect with my grandmother.
The real beauty of being in relationships, romantic or otherwise, is our differences. One friend likes a particular neighborhood in Mexico City which was not the neighborhood where we were staying. Her recommendation inspired our visit to her preferred stops. My mom didn’t want to see a play with me because her friend didn’t care for it. I took my sister-in-law instead. My mom and I can see a different play in the future. My best friend from high school loves wearing bold colors. I skew towards a more neutral palette. It all works.
Sharing similarities can be a start to a relationship, however compatibility is going to give any relationship its depth and longevity. One of the funniest moments with Phil was when we were discussing which FedEx to use. Phil suggested his favorite FedEx. His criteria was the big parking lot in the back and its predictably peak times to avoid. My pick was the one that is a small satellite office with a loading zone in front that offers easy parking for quick dropoffs. We laughed in recognition of our differences as we enjoy our compatibility. What other couple geeks out on small details about navigating daily errands?
Don’t read further if you are curious about The Lobster and have not seen it.
Toward the end of the movie, our recently divorced man has fallen in love with a woman who was recently blinded. They met as ‘Loners’, outside the confines of the hotel. Yet clearly they are not free of their social conditioning. We are left with the scene of him contemplating blindness. The screen goes dark then the sound of the sea.